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Several years ago a supervisor told me that some of my coworkers felt overwhelmed by my effusiveness in meetings. I left my supervisor’s office hurt and angry. Back at my desk, I wrote a less poetic, more resentful version of the poem below on a page in the portfolio that I carried to every meeting. From that day forward, I would arrive at the meeting, open my portfolio and read the words. When I had a point to make during the meeting I would read the poem instead.
At first it was an act of rebellion. Hah, I’ll show them. I just won’t say anything. But the quieter I become, the more I heard. I discovered that often other people were thinking the same things I was thinking, just saying it differently.
Being silent is not a natural state of being for me. I like to be heard and my tendency is to repeat what I said if I think my point was missed. My supervisor had the courage to point out my flaw, and this poem has helped me grow into a better coworker.
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I still speak up with questions and ideas. But this little poem prevents me from thinking my own voice is the most important.
Today,
I will listen,
I will think,
I will refrain from speaking.
Today,
I will pause,
I will reflect,
I will avoid interrupting.
Today, as I listen,
I will not guess what you are saying;
I will hear it.
I will let you speak.
I will respect your words.
I will be patient,
and I will let your words
gather strength
until they pour forth
what you wish me to know.
I will not push you to a bottom line;
Instead I will guide you with silent support.
I will be calm, serene.
Anxiety will hold no sway.
I will recognize
that I am not always right,
that my way is not always best,
that my agenda is one of many.
I will laugh at your wit,
and keep my humor kind.
Today I will practice this
at home,
at work,
with family,
with friends.
Today I will slow down,
listen,
discern.
Then, and only then,
I might speak.
By Barbara Rath (May 23, 2013)
Note: “What the Voice is Saying” is from the song “Discern” by Phish.
